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Giggles for Days

Cornwall Centre
Joined: 2/8/2012
Posts: 5252
Posted: 8/31/2016 10:29:15 AM     
Hullo! Since everyone's having a sort of meh Wednesday I figured we should get a jokes thread going just to make each other giggle. So post a funny/awful one-liner/joke/pick-up line and we'll all help each other get through the day!

I'll start with one of my favourite pick-up lines:

If a large, bearded man shoves you in a bag in the middle of the night don't panic; I asked Santa to get me you for Christmas. <3

Park Place
Joined: 1/1/2010
Posts: 1029
Posted: 11/16/2017 10:39:40 AM     
mountains just are not funny, there hill areas.

Joined: 11/19/2017
Posts: 1
Posted: 11/20/2017 5:47:27 PM     
A priest is in need of a bell keeper for his cathedral, and decides to hold some interviews to fill the position.
A man comes in for an interview, and the priest is very surprised to find that the man has no arms. The priest, being a kind man, decides to give the man a chance at the job, and takes him up to the bell tower at the top of the cathedral. The priest says "if you can ring this bell, i will give you the job." The armless man then glows with determination and immediately jumps off the platform and falls head first into the bell, ringing it beautifully loud for all to hear. Sure enough, the priest is impressed, and gives him the job.

A week later, as the armless man goes up to ring the bell in the morning, he jumps off the platform to hit the bell with his head, but misses and falls off the side of the cathedral, hitting the ground outside. The priest hears the screams of people outside and goes to take a closer look. There, he finds a group of townsfolk surrounding a body on the ground. One of the townspeople turns to the priest and asks him "I saw him fall from the cathedral tower, do you know who this is?"

The priest says to the man "I do not know the man's name, but his face sure rings a bell!"

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